4. Growing in Sexual Wholeness

Let’s reclaim wholeness. God’s whole glorious gift of Sex and Intimacy, This is worth fighting for.

For married men – 10 Strategies

  1. Start talking one on one, face to face with your wife about the deeper you and let her talk to you about the deeper her. No fix it up comments or advice, just listen. This may require some repentance and repair to your relationship. Make this weekly. You may need some help from another couple.
  2. Sort out the practical problems— bad breath, body odour, going to bed too late, tiredness/fatigue, drinking too much, fear of pregnancy, privacy and irritating habits and so on.
  3. Get help with physiological issues erectile dysfunction, premature ejaculation, dryness, etc etc
  4. Get help with other issues libido, psychological, child hood abuse, hurts, wounds, barriers, deal with grief and sadness etc
  5. Romance – start you foreplay at least 24 hours in advance – no sexual touching, clean up your mess, put your clothes away, help with the house work, do your chores, flowers, gifts, music, candles and so on. Find out what your wife’s love languages are –
  6. Tell her with words that you love her – Do Not assume she knows.
  7. Be brave – this is not easy territory for many, but be a man, not just in your work place but also in your home and in your bed – it is worth it. Do not give up. Do not fear rejection. It can be done.
  8. Talk about sex and what it means for you with your wife and trusted men. Make some agreements about what an ideal sex life might be between you and your wife.
  9. Pray every day – personal, private, still, solitude talk to God about your life and even your sex life. It is not new news for Him. He wants to and can help.
  10. Find ways to be the spiritual leader of your home – go to mass, be faithful to the sacramental life , read the scriptures, speak with your children about the brilliant beauty of sex, laugh lots.




People express and receive love in different ways. Dr. Gary Chapman identifies these as the five languages‚ of love: Quality Time, Words of Affirmation, Gifts, Acts of Service, and Physical Touch. If you express love toward others in a way they don’t understand, they will not realize you’ve expressed your love at all. The problem is that you re speaking different languages. Abridged version of the New York Times bestselling title. Gary Chapman, Ph.D., a well-known marriage counselor and director of marriage seminars, is the best-selling author of The Five Love Languages. He has also authored top sellers The Five Love Languages of Children, The Five Love Languages of Teenagers, The Other Side of Love, Loving Solutions, Five Signs of a Loving Family, Parenting Your Adult Child, Toward a Growing Marriage, and Hope for the Separated.

2. For help healing your marriage after infidelity